It’s mid-August, which means that the Back-to-School season is upon us. Some of your kids have been back in the classroom for a couple of weeks already, some will be returning in the next few weeks, and others have children who are in school year-round.
Whatever Back-To-School looks like for your family, welcome to the season!
For the first 32 years of my life, I operated entirely around the school calendar. My parents were teachers, I attended public school for 13 years, went to college for 4 years to earn a degree in education and subsequently began teaching for the next 5 years at a private school. When our second daughter was born, I left my 7:00-4:00 job as an educator and began providing childcare to other families during the school year. Then my husband began teaching, our oldest began her elementary school career at the same private school, and the rhythm of the school calendar pulsed deeply through our family’s veins.
Then last year we broke the cycle. We launched full-time into life on the road and began homeschooling. At first we tried to follow a typical school schedule, but found it was just not the right fit for our family (more on that another time), and began to create our own rhythms. Over the past year, “school” has become so interwoven into our lives that our children can rarely differentiate between what is “school” and what is “life”. Admittedly, sometimes it’s hard for us as parents to differentiate too, which is one of my favorite parts of our journey toward whole life education.
So, when Back-To-School time rolled around again this past July (REALLY?!), it was a non-event for the first time in my life. While our family formally began our new school year on July 1, the day came and went without new notebooks and backpacks and shoes and haircuts and ice cream socials and photos at sunrise. There was not even new curriculum on that day. We simply continued life as usual, picking up where we had left off in the prior days.
And it was good.
It’s what feels most right for our family right now.
However, each of us need to be resolved to find what is right for our own families for right now. That can change from year to year, or even mid-year.
Some of you have also found the path of homeschooling to be the right fit for your family, and I know that even within the realm of homeschooling you have had to make so many decisions as to what that should look like for your family right now. And when you’ve found your sweet spot, be confident in your decision and boldly move forward on the path that you’ve chosen; whether that’s following a formal curriculum such as Abeka or Calvert, a more classical approach to education, a hybrid school or homeschool co-op, an eclectic mix or radical unschooling. Have a wonderful year learning together with your child(ren)!
Some of you have found a private school or a charter school to be the best fit for your child(ren). I know that this decision requires some huge sacrifices on your family’s part, whether financially or significant time sacrifices or both, and this is a choice that you have not made lightly. If you know that your children are where they need to be in the private or charter school of your choice to partner with you as you educate your children, be confident in that decision. I trust that you will also have a fantastic year together with your child(ren), their teacher(s) and their schoolmates!
Many of you have chosen for your child to attend a public school or public magnet school within your district. Again, this is not a decision that you have taken lightly. When you chose to purchase or rent your home, you did so with the knowledge of which school district your home lies within. You may have paid a premium for your home simply for the privilege of being able to send your child to a premier elementary of high school. Alternately, perhaps the school district that you live in has a lack-luster reputation, but you are confident that it is still the best educational choice for your family. You understand that this might mean providing supplemental tutoring, remedial or enrichment assistance and more to give your child the education that they deserve. You, my friend, are a rock star, and anyone who ever insinuates that choosing public education for your family is the “easy choice” has no idea what they are talking about. I hope that this year is the best one yet for your family!
Some of us begin the countdown to school starting when the last bus drops the kids off at home in the spring. We cannot fathom how teachers do this day in and day out 180 days each year. We love our children, but we love when they aren’t with us 24/7 too. If that’s you–enjoy your “First Day of School” brunch with your girlfriends, pedicure, or simply a peaceful drive in solitude to work. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad or like less of a mother for enjoying this time.
Some of us count down to the first day of school in much the same manner as an inmate on Death Row counts down until it’s his day in “The Chair”. We cannot bear to send our kids off to someone else for seven hours a day. If that’s you, first–have you considered homeschooling? 🙂
Secondly, let the tears flow. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad or less of a mother for struggling to send your child(ren) to school. However, if you have teenagers, you might want to wait until you’ve pulled out of the drop-off line before letting the tears flow. They might not think it’s cool that Mom’s crying in the carpool lane. Even so, they’ll one day understand that the tears that were uncool as a teen were tears of love for them.
Some of us don’t count down to school starting at all. School is so interwoven into life that arbitrarily announcing “The First Day of School” feels more than a little odd. If this is you, enjoy “The First Day of School” today. Or tomorrow. Or next Thursday. Or some arbitrary day in November that just feels right to your family. 🙂
To all of my fellow mothers out there, whatever Back-To-School looks like to your family, have a great one!
Isn’t life funny in that you sometimes find yourself doing–and often loving–the exact things that you once swore that you’d never do?
If there’s one thing that I never wanted to do, it was homeschool.
I had a long list of reasons why it was just not something that would ever work for our family.
Among these reasons:
- I could never be a full-time stay-at-home mom. Of course I’d have to give up outside employment altogether in order to homeschool.
- Our child(ren) would do much better to have a teacher who is not their mother. We would butt heads way too often.
- We are committed to education from a Biblical worldview and had the perfect Christian school for our children to attend. It’s where I was a former teacher and my husband taught for several years as well.
- How on earth could I teach four children at different ages and stages at the same time?
- I’m a former classroom teacher. Homeschooling is for people who balk at formal education, not for teaching professionals.
Well, when our dream of living a lifestyle of full-time travel started to develop into a reality, our oldest daughter was 6 and in Kindergarten at the awesome private Christian school that we’d envisioned her attending since infancy. We slowly realized that on the road, homeschooling would be our only educational option for our children. Back to the drawing board and time to address our arguments against homeschooling if this traveling dream was ever going to come to fruition.
- Yeah, that whole “I could never be a stay-at-home mom” thing? While I was employed anywhere between full-time, to 3 part-time jobs, to one job that was intermittent yet had full-time hours, to one part-time job with minimal hours in my first seven years of motherhood, I never lasted more than three months as a stay-at-home mom before seeking outside employment.
Until last June. I have been a full-time stay-at-home mom for over a year now.
(Well, if you don’t count the fact that my home doesn’t even “stay” anywhere!)
And I’m happy to report that being without gainful employment of my own hasn’t killed me yet!
- The child that I was certain that I would butt heads with in a teacher/pupil relationship? She’s a joy to teach! She’s bright, inquisitive and eager to learn. She begs for more books to read and we often discuss the themes together of the stories that she is reading. As much as I try not to use worksheets and paper/pencil work in our homeschool, she asks to do these and excels at her copywork without complaint. This same child that I had to hover over to complete her homework in Kindergarten has become a self-starter.
- We are still committed to teaching from a Biblical worldview. We have found a literature-based curriculum company, Sonlight Curriculum, that fits well with both our desire to teach our children with a Biblical perspective, while utilizing real, living books to teach from instead of textbooks, and without the over-the-top Biblical integrations that are sometimes a bit of a stretch. We are still able to teach our children in the same manner that they would have been taught at our private Christian school.
- One reason that we initially chose Sonlight as our framework for homeschooling is because it is easily adaptable for multiple ages and ability levels of children. This year, we have an 8, 6.5 and nearly 5-year-old (and nearly 3-year-old) who are all using the same curriculum, with individualized reading and language arts for each child and slightly modified math activities for our younger children from our older girls. It feels an awful lot like teaching in a first grade classroom with some children who are more advanced and working at a second or third grade level and others who are working at a young Kindergarten level. I suppose if our children were a broader age range, then it might pose more challenges, but learning together with our crew is much simpler than I expected that it would be.
- While I struggled to break the mold of “doing school at home” in our first couple of months of homeschooling, I’ve come to see that my philosophy of education lends itself well to homeschooling. Life is all about learning, and by de-compartmentalizing school from life, our educational opportunities as a family have become exponentially greater.
I’m reminded of a conversation that I had with my former principal whom I loved and respected greatly. When our oldest was a baby and I contemplated if and when I might return to the classroom to teach and what the future might hold for our family, she told me, “Christian school is great, but homeschooling is the best, if it works for your family.” Coming from a woman with 50 years of professional educational experience, I’ve always taken that statement to heart.
So, here I am. Doing one of those things that I swore I’d never do…
…And loving it!
I’d dare say that I think that I’ve stumbled upon one of my true passions and callings in life. While I loved teaching in the classroom, and have always been an avid lifelong learner, teaching and learning full-time alongside my own children is where I’ve hit my stride.
I hope that as you journey down the road with us–even if you are committed to “Never, ever be a homeschool mom”–that perhaps you’ll be able to use some of the ideas that I share with your own children, or other kids that you love in your life.
And be careful about what you say you’ll never do. You might have to eat a slice of humble pie one day when you find yourself doing just that thing.
Which reminds me, someday I’ll have to tell y’all about the time that I swore that I’d never, ever, EVER sew again…